Well.. as live as you can get at our age!!!
That's not cheese. That is, in fact, my cherished collection of celebrity earwax. The big lump centre-screen is a highly valuable 1999 Gary O'Shaughnessy - cost me a pretty penny, too!
This image brings memories flooding back of the time I had to carry out a forensic examination of the inside of Russell Brand's underpants. We never did properly identify the true identity of these crusty deposits. Suffice to say, any sane person definitely wouldn't try to smoke them or put them up his nose.
It appears no sane person would eat this either!! - I'm trying for Azeri Cake... watch this space!