Semi 1 review - Parte the seconde....

10. Israel

I don’t know what it is about this song – Maybe its cos it sounds like Dream Lover in the verses, maybe cos it sounds like a mix of other 60’s songs that mean that this sounds oh so familiar but it is very strong.  Lead singer is hardly a looker, but he has that Cool Music Teacher vibe that could well make this song qualify.

11. San Marino

Mum?!, Do I really have to write something about this song??? – really?!?!? – Oh ok then….  It’s hideous, ill conceived, trite nonsense.  Valentina needs to distance herself from this song after May 23^rd.  The Siegel music isn’t the worst part about this – the worst bit is the fact that someone who has OGAE connections wrote the first set of “lyric” without reading the rules!! – Fan Fail there if ever there was some.  It deserves nil.. And “ Googling, giggling, gaggling” is possibly enough to cite this for crimes against the English Language!

12. Cyprus

Thankfully the draw has been kind to mini Greece.  No Introduction nonsense here, oh dear me no, Ivi gets straight into the attack from second one.  It is, as has been remarked, remarkably similar to the Greek song in terms or rhythm and intended audience, but it is far far better than that nonsense.  It has a hook and a darn good earworm of a tune.  My only issue is the fact that its been proved she is not the greatest live singer, and in a live singing contest, that’s gonna prove a massive downfall – mind you, if it doesn’t matter for Jedward….  Qualifying? I should think so. 

13. Denmark

It does seem many years ago since this song was picked.  So far in the dim and distant past I actually had to hear it twice to remember it.   Am not sure that Teen Angst goes down well in Eurovision but again, like Israel, it sounds like some kind of chart nonsense that we have heard before in the mid 90’s by someone that should have not had a career ( Alisha Keys or someone of that ilk perhaps) – It is a typical Danish Plodder – though she needs to get rid of the stupid hat she wore in the Danish Final. Does it have any redeeming features? – Yeah, its familiar and doesn’t make me want to scream “ STFU” at the screen.  It’s what the Danes do well – boringly  predictable.  Qualifying? – Yeah.

14. Russia

If Denmark was boringly predicable and friendly, the Russia Grannies are the Eurovision equivalent of a glass of Irn Bru.  Peculiar looking,  should be vile on the palate and yet is full of e numbers and makes you bounce around!! I can’t, I admit, get through all 3 minutes of this song, as its not to my taste, however I can see that some people will like it lots and give it loads of votes.  It should qualify on the basis that it beat Bima Dilan in a Russian Final quite handily and, for that alone, I am grateful!

15. Hungary

Compact Disco give us a real gutsy track for this one.  It’s a decent and well sung song – However, I think it’s a little bit *too* earnest to do that well despite being the classiest song for some time in this bit.   I just don’t know what is going to differentiate it from the madness before it, and the quite frank genius that comes after it.  If you want a change of pace, this is your one.

16. Austria

This is Genius of the highest order!! – It’s the track that Scooter should have won the German Final with all those years ago when they got trounced.  It has everything 1994 Trance has, including a lack of lyric and talent – but the boys are nice enough and will garner  points from…..well… Germany I would guess ( If they were in this bit!).  Not sure how German “rap” will go down well outside of Germanophiles, but its either gonna bomb spectacularly or score loads!

17. Romania

I didn’t realise Colin Farrell’s younger and more talented brother had emigrated to Romania and decided to sing, but there you go.  This song makes me smile but I fear that its going to be swallowed up by Austria and Ireland to get that many votes.  They were supposed to win this contest fbetween 2002-2007 – has anyone told TVR that they failed to get that win?? – Try harder!!

18. Ireland

What has been said last year could well be written again about this lot.  We know what we’re going to get and the question is “ is that one trick pony back for a 2^nd attempt?” – They appear to have learnt to sing a half decent, but ultimately half arsed schlager song.   It is something that would be in Eurosong in 1988 or 1993.  It’s arguably more old fashioned that San Marino, but I think that they will get it through to the final.  Qualifying? Sadly.