Tuesday, 15 May 2012

There's songs, too?

 I know I'm here mostly for the colour, context and foul gossip, but someone told me that there were songs at this thing too, so I thought I'd better give them a look.

So semi final one then, from my jaded, rock and roll eye...

I can't believe Mr Amadeus has sold out and sent such a poppy song! He used to be so angular and obtuse, but this is practically Justin Beiber compared to his regular stuff!

Lovely, nice looking, but hamstrung by the god-awful sixth form English lyric. I'm not usually one of these language bleaters, but this set of words just make the flesh crawl. Ignore them and it's fab.

The law of diminishing returns is apparently in charge on Syntagma Square right now. I hope she can hear herself a little better by Tuesday week, because pain.

OK, so the lyric might be marginally less cringeworthy, but it's still just a little bit to pleased with itself. And will they just stop walking about, please. I'm getting giddy watching them.

Quite, quite stunning! There's more than one moment when the crowd will break into spontaneous applause at her face pyro (and quite possibly one or two when their eyes will all simultaneously pop as well). The class still might not win her many votes, though. But I do hope it does!

Lively and happy-go-lucky it may be, as nice as they appear to have been strolling around the press centre all day, their performance is just a little too cold-eyed and professional.

I feel like I've been singing this song forever, and every day it's growing on me just a little bit more. Can't call how this is going to do at all, but I do enjoy howling along to their ham-fisted Killers trib song.

As anonymous as it is, it was quite nice to be working on something slightly more interesting as the song's melody was floating around the room yesterday. Still doomed like an Italian cruise liner, though.

I actually quite like this, however dull it may appear. It'll struggle to get though, but its difference might just help it traverse all the madness.

The bounciest song of the tournament, the whole building was absent-mindedly whistling along to it some time after they'd actually finished playing it. It's just a shame that the singer has one of those punchable faces.

San Marino
Kind of what you're expecting, really. They've gone for the full High School Musical schtick - including pom-poms and cheerleader outfits. They've even got a thinly-disguised MacBook on stage with her. She can't dance for shit, mind.

Actually much more likable than I'd imagined - even if she does have a voice like someone slapping a sheet of plastic with a cat. I fancy this could win the battle of the Grecos. And some.

Exactly the same show as their home final - but of course, if it ain't broke... A terrifically mediocre song performed superbly well. Another tricky-to-call song, and probably wouldn't qualify if this was just a radio-based contest.

Forget what the old curmudgeon said: If this doesn't win, then Europe's that bad word that begins with C. And I don't mean chutney. Really lovely, charming and bouncy. It'll be the only song that real people will be taking about come Sunday - won or lose.

Bolted on favourite to become the song that comes last that no one imagined would do so badly. There's just nothing about it!

Remember fun? This is it, in big letters with spangly bits and stray custard all over it. It's rural, it's raunchy and it's got tractors in it - what more could a boy want. Doing Eurovision how it ought to be done - with a gurt big smile on it's face and its fingers crossed behind its back.

Wins the award for the most high-concept routine of the week so far. At various points rides one of his backing singers like a pony, then affects a boat race by standing on her back and rowing! And there's also likely to be some kind of prop or costumed-based McGuffin at the start, because they were doing that mimey thing songs do when they don't want to blow their costume reveal too early.

Jedward have a water feature in among their customary kitten-on-nip high jinks. They also let slip that there may be a shower scene at some point in their preference - although most of the UK are hoping it'll be the one from Psycho. Nice time, happy happy.

Picking ten out of that bunch is nigh on impossible - were going to lose some pure Eurovision gems from this semi, and no mistaking!

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